Overall, it was a good week. As I mentioned last week, all of a sudden it's Sunday again. Each day is an opportunity to have precious moments. Definitely, there is a lack of sleep involved, but I do close my eyes when I need a catnap. I am lucky that for many many years I functioned well on a few hours of sleep at night. There are so many ups and downs to caregiving. As I explained to the hospice case nurse, it's like a roller coaster. Today I thought of including the term ferris wheel because we continue in a circle, but every so often the wheel stops and you hang there for a bit. I have no idea why amusement park rides are on my mind. I have a fear of both so perhaps that's how I can relate them to caregiving.
My mom has been home a month now and what a month we've had. I had a few laughs this past week with my mom as a bit of her old ways came through. We were both in the living room and she crooked her finger to call me over. I went over and leaned down to her level. Next thing I know she rapped me off the head. I said, what's that for? She just smiled. I thought to myself, not sure what memory came up for you, but I must have been mouthing off or something. The next night when Kate (helps me at night) was here, my mom had me lean down and rapped me off the cheek. I said, what did I do now? She said, "you're fresh." Kate started laughing and my mom had a big grin on her face. We also have moments that truly make me stop and just breathe. I generally wake her up slowly with a glass of juice and we sit for a few minutes before I bring her breakfast in bed. Yesterday, she kept reaching out and touching/feeling my face. I think my glasses throw her off. We also sit at night and hold hands for a while before Kate arrives. Mom and Lady got to know each other a little better as she petted Lady a couple of times and spoke to her.
I finally got surveillance/motion detector cameras for the house. They were delayed due to a problem in quality control, but they arrived and I have been playing ever since. I have not figured out every nuance yet, but so far so good - can do more than I have set up so far. I can live stream from my phone Also has audio so I can listen which I have not done before (ah technology). The picture is really clear and the circumference is much more than I expected. Even with what I have figured out so far, I wish I had them when my mom was in the nursing home. Currently, I can only live stream as I have not picked up an SD card for recording. I have indoor cameras, but with quality this good, I just might be ordering the outdoor camera as well.
I have free HBO this weekend, so I'm recording a bunch of movies that eventually I may watch. Sometimes I watch a movie and then think..why did I waste my time? But then again, I did sit for awhile and let my mind wander so perhaps that's a good thing. I like the fact that I can always delete if not interested.
I am trying to stick to my routine of reading a chapter or two in the morning while sipping coffee. The TV is on with no sound so I can look up to see headlines, if I want. I try to keep the noise level down until about 8:00 to give Lady and my mom time to sleep. I get ready for the day as soon as I get up, but this is my quiet time.
I am going to leave it here for today. I feel like there is more I could be saying, but nothing is coming to the forefront of my mind - perhaps it needs more coffee (LOL!). I hope you have a wonderful week. Take care. Chat soon.
"Begin today. Declare out loud to the universe that you are willing to let go of struggle and eager to learn through joy." - Sarah Ban Breathnach
“Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.” – Doug Larson
“Spring won’t let me stay in this house any longer! I must get out and breathe the air deeply again.” – Gustav Mahler