I've been a bit sad as a few of the people who were in the nursing home with my mom passed on in the past couple of weeks. Although, I know they are at peace and will be guardian angels for those that need them, it still is sad. I have always heard that death comes in groups, so to speak, and over the past several years I have definitely noticed this. There are usually two to four within a few weeks. I am going to try to get to a service or two as I got to know them or family a bit. One person was so on my mind the other day, that I tried to find his wife's phone number and had intentions of calling the nursing home the next day to see if I could leave a message for her.
I just had to go to the front door as I kept hearing what I thought was a bird getting louder and louder. Turns out a chipmunk was sitting on the step looking at the front door. When I said, Oh it's you making all that noise, the chipmunk scurried away. So you know me and symbols, I had to look it up:
Chipmunk spirit animals are a symbol that something good is on it's way to you, something wonderful that delights your heart that make you smile and laugh. The Chipmunk totem energy is also a sign that you will have an important conversation with someone close to you very soon, pay attention to the details!
So with the above information, I'll see what the next few days bring.
My mom had an up and down week. More time resting and/or in bed. All to be expected, but hard to watch/see. She had a great visit with her cousin (which I am so grateful for the surprise visit), mom happened to be up that day and engaged. We had to say goodbye to our social worker Bill. His territory is changing and he will no longer support us. Although I know this happens, he has been with us from the beginning of my mom's hospice and also was with us through my dad's passing. It will be good for him and I'm glad for him in many ways, but sad that we are losing the best social worker I have ever met. I told him, he needs to teach others how to do what he does.
We are on our own most of the day today, so although she ate her breakfast and chatted a little, it's almost time to handle the freshening up and possibly getting up. As many of you know, ALZ at some point takes away much of the way people communicate as they have a hard time finding/forming the words needed. There are times when my mom is crystal clear and other times when I watch her struggle to form and I try to determine what she saying. I'm not making fun, but as an example - the other morning I go into her room and my mom says, I need to turn off my watch, where's my watch? Well, she has not worn a watch in several years and even when she did it was old fashioned and did not work well. So, as I stood there trying to determine what she was talking about, I heard the birds chirping loudly. I realized she was trying to turn off an alarm clock (there are no clocks in her room) or the old cuckoo clock they had several years ago. So I went over and shut the window so she would not hear the birds too much. So I said, don't worry mom I'll turn off the alarm and she went back to resting. It's like solving a puzzle sometimes and I definitely have to have patience and many times a sense of humor.
I had an amazing energy session the other day. I went to meditation class and the other members could not attend. The class is hardly ever cancelled as the instructor believes that whomever is there is meant to be there. Well, it turned into a session for me. I mentioned on FB the other day that I might fall asleep and boy did I ever. I saw colors and symbols and felt like a weighted blanket was on me (no blanket just energy stones). When I woke up, it took a few minutes before I could even move, but I felt great.
I had an experience saying "NO" the other day. I know those of you that worked with me in the past will say, Marie never had a problem saying no at work! It's easy to say no until I find out the details of a project/program/request, but when it comes to helping someone I hate saying no. I will try to squeeze in the request, drop my own schedule to help another person, change plans to assist, etc. So when I have to say no the guilt really kicks in. Although I know that guilt is a useless emotion and I had a good reason to say no, it does not mean it did not get me for a time. It's all good and worked out for all involved, but the stress level definitely rose a little. How do you handle requests?
Belated Happy 45th Wedding Anniversary to my friends Melanie and John!
I am going to leave it here for today. I need to get moving or at least have another cup of coffee. I hope you have a good week. Take care. Chat soon. Marie
“There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It’s why you were born. And how you become most truly alive.” ―Oprah Winfrey
“If you organize your life around your passion, you can turn your passion into your story and then turn your story into something bigger―something that matters.” ―Blake Mycoskie
“Lean forward into your life. Begin each day as if it were on purpose.” ―Mary Anne Radmacher