I am in a good place emotionally although I have my moments of sadness - which I believe is completely normal. I know I am grieving in my own way and will continue to do so as needed. As you know, when someone passes who was such an important part of your life, it takes a while to create a new norm. Thank goodness for my BFF Patti as she has done a yeoman's job of sorting and separating many things in the house. So much stuff to sort out and she took that on to relieve me. I will need to go through at some point, but WOW what a job she has done. The local charities will be inundated over the next few weeks with clothes, food, medical equipment and gadgets. I found a local place to take the used lancets (found several containers) so they go tomorrow. One day at a time, one task at a time.
I re-read what I published last week and realized one topic I did not talk about was "lack of control." As many of you know I like to be in control..LOL! I feel stressed when things to do not go as planned. I found myself thinking about the past few weeks and realized how "little" I was in control and it was ok. I planned and had a notion of what would happen and when, but I could not control: the weather, people, traffic, emotions, feelings, the mail, bureaucracy, the kindness of others, etc. I also realized that I truly did not stress over any of it. I have never talked with so many helpful/thoughtful people in my life and I think that helped me make it through what needed to be done. I believe when you deal with helpful people it takes some of the stress away.
As all the news lately is about personal information leaks and such, I spent some time contacting vendors and doctors that papa used and advised them to close his records as he had passed. So many kind words about papa and what a thoughtful man he was. I think they were surprised that I reached out, but I explained the data breach and want to be sure his records are closed. Still have a few items to take care of, but the majority of this type of work is complete.
The one thing I have put off is reviewing the cards and items from the funeral home. I have them all in one place and will get through them, but I look at the stash and walk away. I will acknowledge everything my family received, but it will be a few more weeks.
As many of you know from previous posts, papa hated Mexican type food. As I work on cleaning out the freezer and cabinets I am leaning toward Mexican. I made turkey tacos the other day and they were yummy. I am also making Mexican fiesta chicken and Mexican potatoes for Sunday dinner today. I know the kids like Mexican food so it will be good to have something different.
I am attending the community Friendship Club meeting today. They requested I attend as they are going to rename the kitchen after papa. He would be embarrassed, but honored. He cooked many breakfasts and dinners for many years and loved doing it. I have heard so many fun stories from his "helpers" and how he ran the kitchen. We'll see how this meeting is run compared to the HOA meeting last week. I promise I only started a little trouble with my questions..LOL!
I am going to end it here today. I am so blessed to have a BFF who will give up several weeks of her time to help me sort and clean. My wish is for all of you to have a friend like that. I hope you have a good week. I am carrying my stones/angels with me, I hope you have something that you carry for balance and energy. Take care. Chat soon. Marie
“Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, smarter than you think and twice as beautiful as you’ve ever imagined.” – Dr. Seuss
“You don’t have to control your thoughts; you just have to stop letting them control you.” – Dan Millman
“Life isn’t about getting and having, it’s about giving and being.” – Kevin Kruse