My week was full of ups and owns as I'm sure yours has been too. Trying to remain present, but always anticipating alternatives. My mom provided lots of fun moments this past week as she was in great spirits and laughed much of the time. Don't worry it was not all sunshine and roses, but for the most part she provided lots of positive spirit and memories. She ate fairly well although she won't ask for food - she will most of the time eat as long as I feed her, but once in a while she will clamp her teeth together and I know that's it! She does get a bit frustrated as she can not form all the words she wants and I can see her trying so hard to communicate. It's sometimes a guessing game trying to figure it out without upsetting her. It is definitely a reason I see many ALZ patients become quieter and quieter.
It was a bit sad for me as the 8th would have been my parent's 61st wedding anniversary. Also, on my parents first anniversary my mother lost her mother. I'm sad because the past year has brought changes to my family. I don't know whether to be sad or grateful that my mom did not have any idea that it was her anniversary or the date. She barely says the word husband any longer. She does mention "him" a lot. Perhaps I should be grateful that ALZ has taken those memories so at least she is not sad or grieving for her mother any longer.
I have to say I went to an interesting Friendship Club meeting the other night. It was to push through new bylaws because of changes made by the board without consulting the membership. You know me, I had researched, had my list of questions (always present) with me so I could ask calmly and intelligently. I explained that my questions were not to sway the membership one way or the other, but to provide clarification. I asked that the questions become part of the minutes or background materials for record keeping purposes. I can not say that all my questions were answered, but it brought a bit of calmness to the group. I have to say, that many of the people were judgmental and obnoxious - they did not want to let certain people speak or ask questions. Truly made me think about whether or not I want to even be involved. I appreciated the explanations provided and some of the discussions, but you could definitely see the split between old school/new school so to speak. I was one of the few that did not approve the new bylaws, but as I explained to the chair after, "it's not that I don't agree with the bylaws, but there are many changes needed and I was taught never to sign anything until you see the final version."
My niece Melanie graduated high school this past week. WOW the time has flown! She and her friends are adults for all intents and purposes; capable of making all their own decisions and accepting the consequences. This is the time when they start to spread out across the world to make their way. In my niece's case, she will work and attend community college until she finds where she wants to sparkle. I hope she finds a way to experience all she wants to as she continues to learn and grow. The principal provided one of the most inspirational speeches I have heard - I actually called the school the next morning to compliment her. The school has been going through some tough times as they recently lost four juniors in a car accident and she mentioned that going through this changed her entire thought process for her speech. She talked about living love not just saying it and using it as a throw away word - which so many do. I will say we froze at graduation as the ceremony was outside and the breeze was quite brisk. I said to my sister, "what did you do in June for graduation? Response: get pneumonia!"
I finished reading: THE SEASONS OF MY MOTHER by Marcia Gay Harden. It's her tribute to her mother who has ALZ and it is about family, love and flowers. Beautifully written with tears and laughter.
I am going to leave it here for today. My elderly neighbor requested my assistance in cooking something for his grandson's graduation party. He does not cook any longer and knows I enjoy cooking for large groups. I'm making a few pans of baked rigatoni (for them and my family). Started the process last night, but need to put it together this morning and get it in the oven. This neighbor has done some much for me over the past few years that there is no way I could turn him down. I also need to pull out my book to study as I'm supposed to take a class/test tomorrow for a food handlers certification. Yes, I know I'm always learning/doing something. I originally intended to help the friendship club kitchen, but now I'm on the fence. Of course, I can always use it for other things. Oh well, if I head to the clubhouse in the morning then I'll know it was meant to be.
I hope you have a good week where you are. Learn something new! Smile at a stranger! Take care. Chat soon. Marie
Inspiration today from Graduation Quotes -
"Ditch the dream and be a doer, not a dreamer, whether or not you know what your 'passion' might be. The truth is, it doesn't matter. You don't have to know. You just have to keep moving forward. You just have to keep doing something, seizing the next opportunity, staying open to trying something new." - Shonda Rhimes
"Each one of us has the ability to lead a dynamic life by pursuing our unique goals and dreams. There are no limits to what you can accomplish when you know who you are and have faith in what you can do." - Stedman Graham
"You can complain about the direction of your life all you want, but until you sit in the driver's seat and begin to drive yourself, you aren't going to get where you want to go!" - Les Brown